Sermon Notes:
1. Self-Centered Pride is the Problem vs.20-21
2. Conflicts are rooted in differences of Points of View
3. The Problem is not in our differences, the Problem is in our brokenness
4. We need to willingly be held accountable to God vs.22-24
5. We need to follow God’s Rules of Engagement
a. No angry, provoking, disrespectful language v.29
b. Take responsibility for your own dysfunction v.31
c. Let forgiveness govern your relationships v.32
Follow-up Questions from Sunday:
Icebreaker Question:
Looking back at your notes from this week’s teaching, was there anything you heard for the first time or that caught your attention, challenged, or confused you?
Digging Deeper: READ Ephesians 4:20-32
1. PRIDE: How can selfish pride be toxic to a relationship? How do you minimize the effects of pride? vs.20-24
2. 6 BLIND MEN: How is society like the 6 blind men? Why is it important that they get along? v.25
3. GOOD/BAD CONFLICTS: There are good and bad conflicts.
a. In what ways can conflicts be good?
b. What factors contribute to make conflicts turn bad?
c. What can we do to make conflict have a positive outcome?
4. ACCOUNTABILITY:
a. Why is it hard to have a relationship with someone who has no accountability?
b. How can we hold ourselves accountable to God? v.24
5. ANGER: vs.26-27
a. The sermon talked about pushing buttons. What are common buttons people have? Do you have any? Please share.
b. How can anger become a pattern of behavior or addiction? How do you manage your anger?
c. How does anger give other people power over your emotions? Why is that not good?
6. FRAGILE/MATURE PEOPLE: Fragile people react. Mature, emotionally healthy people respond. What is the difference? On a scale of 1-10 (10=mature) where do you fall? Please share.
7. I STATEMENTS vs. YOU STATEMENTS: v.29 AVOID YOU NEVER… /AND YOU ALWAYS… STATEMENTS
You statements blames the other person, while I statements takes responsibility for your own actions and feelings and focuses on the behavior, not attacking the person. Ex: I’m disappointed at you because you didn’t listen to me vs. When you don’t listen to me, I get disappointed.
Rephrase these statements in a better way:
a. You’re always late!
b. You never do what I tell you to do!
c. You’re not listening to me!
d. You make me so angry when you do that!
e. I don’t have time to do it!
f. That’s not my job!
g. You hurt my feeling when you ignore me!
h. I told you that a million times! Just do it!
Taking it Home:
Meditate on vs. 30, 32 and focus on why accountability to God and forgiveness are the keys to successful relationships.